Do You Really Need That?
No. 70
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Greetings! I hope you had a full and peaceful Thanksgiving! I ate tons of stuffing—my favorite.
We are in the midst of the holiday markdown season. Black Friday today, with Cyber Monday coming up fast. What used to be one (in stores) and then two (online) days of sales has turned into two weeks of non-stop promotions, with each retailer and brand trying to beat out the next to garner your wallet share and rapidly move their merchandise.
Amid all these fire sales, I encourage you to slow down and take your time to purchase. Be intentional.
Upon immediate reaction, you might think, “Well, that’s silly, Laura. Why would I not take advantage of paying +30% less for something?” The answer: because you probably don’t need it.
While en route to NYC on Wednesday, I almost got caught up in the flurry of it all. I was scrolling through a marquee retailer’s app because I have a $500 gift card and thought, maybe this is the time to spend it, but I quickly reminded myself… I didn’t want anything meaningful from the sale, and I wasn’t ready to purchase anything beyond the gift card amount because I didn’t really feel like buying something just to spend the gift card (who doesn’t love Monopoly money?). How liberating.
It’s easy to get sucked into these sales right now and lose track of how and why you ended up in a virtual cart until it’s too late. After all, 96% of shoppers are expected to overspend this season, according to a TD Bank survey.
Undoubtedly, countless hours—and credit card charges—add up as you scroll the merchandise webpages of retailers and click through the different categories of items on Amazon, all while you’re being flooded with SMS promotions (I woke up to 30 promotional texts — yes, I do subscribe to a lot, that’s for my work).
I’m cautioning you not to hit pay as quickly as you may have previously. It’s also increasingly more accessible to buy things from your phone, which is why this conversation matters. I have countless friends and clients who admit to Instagram target ad purchases (their credit cards are plugged into Apple Pay and autofill on browsers). It’s all designed this way and only getting more frictionless.
Now, I’m not saying you shouldn’t buy anything. You don’t have to go cold turkey (unless you like that kind of leftovers 😉—poor pun, and yet I still kept it in). But if that’s your prerogative, awesome. Nonetheless, be keenly aware of not overspending and buying something you may regret later.
Here’s how to be in control of your spending this holiday sale season:
Use Your (and others) Wishlist
Bookmark items in your browser, heart them on your favorite brand or retailer’s website or drop photos and links into a spreadsheet. Whatever way you need to keep track of the socks, bags, jewelry, water bottle, or the latest kitchen appliance, go for it. Gathering the assortment of what you want in one or a few places gives you visibility into what you’re considering. It also allows you to weed things out.
When you ❤️ something one day, you may not want it the next day. That’s the beauty of a wishlist. It allows you to buy in without actually buying. And you can change your mind later by removing it from the list without consequence.
When purchasing things off someone else’s wishlist, around this time of year, there is a little more intention going into sharing what you want with someone else, so don’t overthink it when someone tells you what they want. Believe them. And apply this thinking to your wishlist.
Must Pass the Must Love Test
I sent a small handful of shopping recommendations to a few clients and friends this morning who have mentioned specific items they have been searching for. Those who have received my shopping recs know what comes next after sharing a link—holiday season or not. I always say, “must love it.” If not, great, then move on and don’t think twice. It’s compelling to say no.
It’s easy to get caught up in the overload of sales. We’re hardwired for it. The excitement around a bargain enables you to believe you are obtaining more things for the same budget you may have set. But really, it’s more than that. It’s dopamine.
Navigating these sales and all the pop-ups bombarding you is equivalent to playing a game. If you score something for $80 less than the original price, that makes you believe you’re winning. On the one hand, you are in the moment. But on the other, are you genuinely gaining ground when it was $80 less than what you didn’t even plan on spending in the first place?
When cleaning out a client’s closet, I will ask them why they’re holding onto something so dearly that I recommend removing it. Prompted by, “Would you buy this in a store today?” I would go further now by suggesting you ask yourself, “Do I see myself wearing this in a year?” and more, “Even if you have the budget, do you really need to buy it?”
I did make three purchases today: two ivory sweaters and a black belt. They were all items I had my eye on and was waiting to see if the price would drop, which it did. I was willing to take the risk when I initially put them on my wishlist and accepted the possible outcome that they would sell out due to waiting. I bought them because they’re classics, and I have given myself ample time to marinate on truly wanting them and visualizing how I would wear them in the future. These types of articles of clothing are uniform staples for my aesthetic, so it made sense.
If you’re on the fence about something, sleep on it. If it’s sold out the next day, then it wasn’t meant to be anyway.
Happy holidays and happy smart shopping!
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🍎 A Few Days in NYC
Holiday Edition
New York City holds a special place in my heart. I grew up just north of the city and lived/worked in Manhattan after college before moving to St. Louis. I continue to return about every other month for work (client closet visits, shopping trips, and visiting with brands/stores) and fun with family. It’s always extra special to be here during the seasonal cheer.
I’m often asked what my favorite spots are (I’m sure you have been asked the same when it comes to a place you frequent), and I’m delighted to share a few favorites and must-do activities in uptown NYC during the holiday season:
Walk 5th Avenue for the Windows — Bergdorf’s just revealed their holiday windows; these displays get me every year. The artistry and execution that goes into bringing these magical visuals to life are outstanding, and the stores tend to outdo themselves each season somehow. Start walking down Fifth Avenue from the Plaza and land at Saks for a grand finale with Dior. Bravo to the artists and engineers who make this delight possible!
Beverages & Bites at The Mark — This is a staple spot for my husband, Mark, and me in NYC. We always pop in here for drinks when we’re in town. It’s cozy, chic, and has animated people-watching. We’ll splurge on caviar around the holidays.
See a Show at The Met — My in-laws have attended The Magic Flute at Lincoln Center since before Mark and I met. It doesn’t get as much attention as the Rockettes or the Nutcracker, but it’s a quintessential winter staple I’ve come to love. We listen to the album when decorating the tree and opening gifts on Christmas morning.
Start Your Day with Bagels — This is going to be controversial, but I stand firmly in my love for H&H Bagels. We only get them when we can walk into their store and order an everything bagel fresh out of the boil and slathered with scallion cream cheese. They’re so warm off the press you don’t need to put them in the toaster. When we’re not here, we ship Ess-a-bagel home to STL.
Shopping in NYC — There are plenty of opinions on this and a wide range of places to shop, which I’m sensitive to. My favorite is to start at 57th Street for the luxury retailers (Tiffany to Bergdorf’s), then head north up Madison up to the mid-80s. You’ll pass by Hermès, Ralph Lauren, Veronica Beard, La Ligne, J.Crew, Alice & Olivia, Vince, Reformation, and the like. Bonus: turn back south and walk along Fifth Avenue and Central Park to make it a shopping loop.
Stop for Chocolate — The chocolate-covered orange peels from La Maison du Chocolat are a favorite! When picking up a few mixed gift boxes for friends and the Orangettes for myself, I also taste test a surprise praline. If you can’t make it to NYC, you can get them here.
Step into the Park — The reservoir is my favorite place to run in NYC. But not in Nov-Dec. It’s still a delightful stroll with a park feel with skyline views facing east, south, and west.
We could not be more aligned here — glad you used the study stat! I’m currently in NYC and loved the Dior branded Saks windows!